Tag: ranchlife

Why… Just Why?

Posted on by onlyinastauffworld

Last week was rough on the ranch. We are getting close to being done with calving. Waiting on two stragglers, one older cow and one going to be new momma. I don’t stray far or long during calving season. I had a Dr. appt in town that I had already canceled and The Stauff said that they would be fine. The older cow, “Mavis” knew what to do and the younger cow looked to be out for a few more days. So I made a run for town. I got all my running done, dropped J’s stuff off to her and raced back home. Raced all day and it still took all day. Nothing is quick when you live an hour from town and 2.5 hours from the nearest “big town”.

I get home and it was getting dark. I went to find Mavis. I knew where she had been that morning and sure enough, she was still there. Although now she was pacing and looking frazzled. A little worry crept into my belly. I got off the 4 wheeler and walked down to where she was. She had been right next to the creek and sure enough, she had calved and the calf was in the creek, shivering. Mavis was frazzled to the point she was pawing the ground and flinging dirt and mud into the air that was raining down on me and the calf. Now, the calf wasn’t in a lot of water, but enough. I went and got our hook that we carry on the 4 wheeler and grabbed his back foot. I pulled him as far up the bank as I could. Mavis instantly went to town licking on him and bawling at me to get the hell away from her calf. I ran back to the house and grabbed some nurse mate to give to the calf, thinking it might help him get up. I fly back and tip toe back across the creek. Mavis was still frazzled. I couldn’t blame her, I would be the same. I eased up to the calf and gave him a shot of nurse mate. He let out a a little bawl and Mavis came running over (as my life flashed before my eyes). She went to licking on him. I grabbed all of my stuff and went home. We would see what tomorrow would be.

I didn’t sleep at all that night. I watched the clock flip to every hour. Finally at 5:30 it was light enough to go see what had happened. I grabbed my hat, and coat and set out. The calf was still in the same spot. My heart dropped knowing it was dead. I got off the 4 wheeler and walked towards it. Mavis still pacing beside it. As I got close the calf moved its head a little bit. I jumped down next to it and rubbed on it. It was alive. “Ok”, I thought, “I will try my best to save you”. I ran down to our barn and grabbed my little calf sled. I brought it back up and lifted the calf into the sled, tied it to the 4 wheeler and pulled it up out of the creek channel. Mavis followed close behind watching her baby be carried away. My plan was perfect until Mavis saw the other cows and she ran to them instead. I thought, “ok, plan B, just take the calf to our basement”. Which I did, it was closer to than the barn anyway.

I pulled the calf sled into our basement and started a fire in our stove. I left the door open on the stove so the heat could roll out to him. I grabbed blankets and started rubbing him down, from his hooves to his ears. The dogs came down to join me and to see what the fuss was about. Sydney, the older dog went into action. She started licking his nose and worked her way down his neck. His eyes were sunken in and I knew he probably had never gotten up and sucked. I ran to our tote with all the milk replacement and electrolytes. I propped him up so he wasn’t laying flat on the floor and ran upstairs to prepare his concoction of hope. I flew back down stairs and tried to give him a bottle. He swallowed a little, but never really sucked. I texted The Stauff. He said to try and call the neighbor to see if they could drench him. I texted him and he said he would be there in 10 mins.

He showed up and was able to drench him. His mouth still cold, but his belly was full. The neighbor left and I settled in beside him praying for a miracle. I would rub on him with warm towels and tried to help him stand. He remained limp and unable to stand let alone suck down a bottle. As the day wore on, he would bawl a few times and then lay back down. He gave me hopes that all was going to work out and then other times, my heart would get sad knowing deep down in my belly he wasn’t going to make it. The Stauff said he was going to come home after work and drench him again.I said to be sure to call me before you leave, as I think he is dying. He asked me why I would say that, and I told him, it was just a feeling. I stayed by his side all day, rubbing on him, trying to get him to drink, and basically asking God himself for a little help.

It was getting close for the The Stauff to be getting home and I was still sitting there talking to my little calf when I noticed tears streaming down his face. I said, “ahh sweet boy, no reason for tears, The Stauff will be here soon and he will get some warm milk in your belly. We will have you back with your Momma soon”. I wiped his steady stream of tears off of his face. About that time I got a call from the lodge asking for some groceries. I told the baby that I would be right back.

I took the stuff to the guys at the lodge and ran back. I wasn’t gone 10 mins. I got back and went back to my perch next to my new found buddy. I started rubbing on him and talking to him. My eyes glanced as his belly. Then my heart stopped when I realized that his also had stopped. He had waited until I left. Hot tears dropped on the same sweet nose that I had just wiped his tears off of. Both dogs came and sat by me as I fell to tears. I got up off the floor and went and sat in a chair beside him. The Stauff arrived about 20 minutes later.

The Stauff walked in and saw me staring at the calf with a pool of tears soaking into my sweatshirt. He looked at me and then at the calf, “Is he gone?”. I shook my head yes and said, “yea, about 20 mins ago”. He checked the calf and then picked him up and carried him out. I got up and started cleaning up my mess. Milk replacer all over the counter, different sized bottles, the drenching bottle, blankets and towels all to pick up. The Stauff came back and said that he had taken care of the calf and had put the sled away. My brain was mush. Everything that I had begged for the last 24 hours was gone and all I really wanted to do was crawl into bed and cry.

The Stauff went around the cows and found that the cow that we didn’t think was going to calve was indeed in the process. He said he would stick around and wait to make sure everything was ok with that one. He went to check and then pretty soon he came back. He said, “well, good news and bad news. Good news is, she calved and the calf is up. The bad news is, there are a bunch of cows and calves around her and the calf doesn’t understand who its mother is and being the first time mom she is getting antsy. So, let’s bring them into the barn where they can get to know each other by themselves.

I grabbed my hat, went and grabbed the sled that was just put away and away we went. The Stauff threw the calf into the sled and the Momma was hot on our tail. She followed us to the barn and after a little persuasion, she went into the barn and into her little box. We grabbed the Momma some sweet alfalfa hay and water and let them be. The Stauff had to get back to work and gave me instructions on what to do the following day.

I went home and sat on the porch with the 2 dogs. I watched Mavis walk out of the group of cows back to where she had last seen her baby. I watched her stop and look all around, holler for her baby and keep on looking for it. I fell apart knowing I failed and I wasn’t able to help her baby. If there would have been a way to tell her how sorry I was, I would have done it in a heart beat. I sat there and listened to the frantic cry of a mother who lost her baby and desperately wanted to find it. I finally collapsed into bed with swollen eyes and a broken heart.

The next morning, I again got up early and said a little prayer, to God, Jesus, Dad, Great Grandparents, spirit guides and actually anyone who would listen. I begged them to have this calf be healthy and know who it’s Momma was.

I snuck into the barn and held my breathe. Little rays of sunlight sneaking through the cracks in the wall. The calf was curled up in the opposite corner that I had left her in the previous night. The Momma was still munching on her sweet alfalfa. I walked over to the calf curled up by the fence. The Momma immediately started talking to it. I knelt beside it and she lifted her head to meet my gaze. I reached out my hand to rub her nose and there, resting on her face was a little white patch of hair in the shape of a teardrop. Considering all of our cows are 100% black, it surprised me. The Momma was sucked down and all was well. I kicked open the gate to let them out into the big pen in the corrals. The Momma started to walk out and turned and talked to her baby. The baby jumped up and wobbly legs slowly stepped into the warmth of the sunlight. The sun highlighted her white tear drop and it stopped me. Grandpa had always said when you get those little random spots they are really kisses from angels.

I dropped my head thinking of my little baby yesterday and the tears that were running down his face. He might have died, but maybe he helped save this one and in doing so, dropped her a kiss on the face just for me. I smiled as the little calf started to feel new energy run through her as she gave a few little bucks trying to keep up with her Momma. I smiled and thought, “yea, this one gets a name. I don’t care what The Stauff says”.

And so ends calving of 2026. I lost one, and I repeat a could’a, should’a, would’a every day and probably will until the day we sell our steers. Then next year, I will have another round of begging and prayers to anyone who will listen. The circle of life on a ranch. I don’t think it ever gets easier, you just learn to pivot and move and hope some frantic Momma cow doesn’t turn your ass upside down. And… did I mention we had a fire on the ranch? Oh yea.. next story.

Come again?

Posted on by onlyinastauffworld

I wear a lot of hats. I have the real job that helps pay the bills, that seems like I juggle about 5 hats in itself. I have one that takes care of the ranch. I have one that takes care of Paleo. I have a few others that fill in the time during the week. Only 1 pays and they are all brought on by yours truly. Purely not complaining, just saying, the kid is busy. Someone asked me today what I will do on my time off. “Time off”.. hmm novel concept, but I don’t really have time off, I have a time where I change hats. Sadly, it just seems like I just keep adding to the plate. Writing is my only escape from it all and at times even it feels like a job. I have to write stuff out or it just sits in my brain, swirling, until it projects into my Mac. Even with all my jobs, I am fiercely protective of all of them. Which leads me to today…

I have been busy booking stays at the lodge for the past few months. Trying to get my niche figured out for Paleo. Breathing new life into an old concept, or maybe just redefining the original concept. Either way working every angle. I have molded it, dreamt it, and prayed on it for a while. I had a guy call about a month ago to come stay. I am going to refer to him as “Cat”, cause he was some type of cat and I want to keep this cleaner than the name I really want to call him. Cat texted me to reserve the lodge in July for a week and wanting to talk. I at first was like, “cool, this is getting SO exciting”. I immediately texted back and said, “Yes, would be happy to talk about Paleo”. Then he ghosted me until Easter Sunday. He texts, “Can we talk today?”. I raised an eyebrow and thought, “Pal… My family is here and we are all enjoying each other, so I am going to say I didn’t see the text. You can wait till tomorrow”. Which I did. I texted him the next day and said, “Hey, I apologize I didn’t visit with you yesterday, being it was Easter, my family and I were doing some stuff. Available today”, and I gave him a handful of times to reach out. He went back and forth on the time and we finally settled on a time.

He called me a few minutes after the time. It is fine, whatever. He starts out with explaining what is going on in his life. I am blankly staring at my wall wondering WTH I was doing. He then tells me the dates he is coming.

I interjected, “What are you going to be doing?”.

He stopped like I had just asked for his blood type.

He said, “well, digging dinosaurs”.

I thought, “Come again?”.

I said, “oh, interesting, where are you digging at?”.

He scoffed at me and said, “well at your ranch! Don’t you have things to dig?”.

I said, “actually no, we don’t.”

You could tell he was getting edgy, but I was as well.

He said, “well, don’t you have a microsite?”.

I said, “yea, but you are not going to sit on it for week. That is just a spot to go and look and sit for maybe an hour and move on”.

He stammered. “Well, what about the stuff we find? Can we keep it?”.

My blood pressure was starting to spike. I thought, “Pal, we have a website that covers all of this. Obviously you didn’t check it out”. I was taken aback thinking, he isn’t even going to ask what we offer? He is just telling me what he is going to do?

I said, “well, if you are on private land owned by us, it is our property, so, no, you get what we allow”.

Then he proceeded to complain about my price to stay at the lodge.

I stood firm and at this point I was hoping he was getting the vibe that this might not be the place to go.

He ended the conversation with, “I will have to talk to the rest of my group and get back to you”.

“Perfect”, I said. I thought, “there ain’t no way in hell, that boy is calling back”.

Sure enough, he ghosted me, until yesterday.

Two weeks had passed since our conversation. He texts completely out of the blue. He had talked to most of the group and they were good. He needed our address and wondered how to put down a deposit. I blankly stared at the phone. I drew in a long deep breathe, “is this cat for real?”. He literally tells me what he is going to do on our ranch, has no plan while he is here and then thinks he can ghost me?”. I immediately shot back with, “so your group is good to have nothing to dig on? Your group is good to not stay on the microsite?”. I waited…. and I waited. I got grumpier.. I kept rolling it in my brain, “Who does this cat think he is?”. I continued to spin it around in my brain for a day, still nothing back from him.

I woke up this AM at my witching hour of 3 AM. Front and center in my brain was this cat. I tried getting back to sleep, I tossed and turned and tossed some more. I got up, got a drink of water, still rolling in my brain what all he had said to me and his actions afterwards. Daylight finally broke and I saw rays of sun gripping the landscape waking it up. I got my warm clothes on to go run around the cows to check for new calves. There was a thick layer of frost on everything. A heavy bank of fog was slowly fading into the creek channel. I jumped on my 4 wheeler and buzzed through the cows, grabbing my magical number. (#12 is still standing strong watching me, and me watching her). I snaked up onto a tall hill where some yearlings were so I could get a count on the cows below. I shut off the 4 wheeler and started counting. The yearlings all wandered up to me and had their heads right next to me. I quit counting and looked at the sweet babies next to me. Wide eyes with long eye lashes studying me. Were they probably looking for a treat? Yes, most likely, but they sure loved on me for a bit. I looked around me at the beauty of the morning. The frost slowly melting into the thirsty earth. The fog bank had almost all disappeared. The blues and yellows of the early morning made me wish for the crayon box God himself gets to use. It was still, it was peaceful and it made me understand my cat.

Looking at those cows and the land made be realize the depth of a being the 4th generation on a family ranch. I thought about my Great Grandmother roaming the same ground as I did. I looked at the yearlings beside me. I said, “What do you think Great Grandma would do with this cat? Would she turn Great Grandpa loose on him?”. I laughed as I turned my head and I locked eyes with one yearling. I quickly looked away and then slowly looked back at her. She was staring right at me. I looked right into her shimmering eyes. Goofy, I know, but it was like that damn yearling looked right into my heart. I say that, cause everything became clear about my cat at that point. I looked around the ranch and said, “yea, it is a privilege to be here not a right”. I got another quick count on the cows and zoomed back to the house. I grabbed my phone and sent a text back to the cat, “I feel like our visions are not the same, thus I am canceling your time at the lodge. I wish you the best of luck in finding a new place to dig”. I threw the phone to my bed beside my 2 hounds and took a long hot shower. Question of the day, did he ever respond? Nope…

Protective? Yes, absolutely. I had a neighbor once that said her mother in law told her when she moved out here that she lived in a palace upon a kingdom and to never forget it. I get that. Is our place a destination? Nope. Is there lush green meadows everywhere? Double nope. Is it a place that holds me? Yep. Is it a place I know like the back of my hand? Yep. Do I make 3 generations proud knowing that I am protecting the ranch? The same one that they busted their asses to keep? Gosh, I pray that I do, cause it crosses my mind a lot. I love this hat that I wear, it is probably my favorite. A privilege, not a right. I think that is my new slogan to folks wanting to sneak a peak at my way life. Maybe I should make some T-shirts with that saying on them for the shop at the lodge. Maybe I will send that cat one… LOL.

Fall=A full circle

Posted on by onlyinastauffworld

When you have cows, falls means one thing, the life of having cows is about to make a full circle. Selling off the calves and the older cows that need to go on down the road. Today was the day that we sold our calves. What is the problem you might ask. Well, it is a long story, so let’s begin.

Growing up we had about 150 head of cows. My Grandpa fussed and cared for each one every year. He knew each cow very well. If he didn’t have a name for them he had a characteristic for each one. He would say, “Ya know that one with the ear that has a cut in it” or “that one with the white front to her”. He knew each one so well, that is actually amazed me as a kid. I assumed every person who had cows possessed such abilities. It didn’t take me long to get the feel of it. I noticed the little things about them. The slide of a foot, swish of a tail, who was cake broke and who was about to be. I think one of the saddest things I have ever watched was taking my Grandpa out to feed cows the the Christmas before he died. My Mom pointed out some of his favorites and he just sat and stared at them and didn’t say a word. To this day it breaks me just thinking about it.

Anyway, I inherited his love of cattle. With our herd, we are the same way. We have names for some and characteristics for others. The Stauff really only has numbers for each one. I am usually asking “who is 62? Is that Mavis?”. He usually rolls his eyes at me and says “I don’t know your damn names”. Although, when we are feeding cake I hear him say, “Come on Frosty, come on”. Yea, yea, don’t know names my ass. We have by no means a “herd” of cows. The Stauff and I promised each other 20 years ago that we would never go in debt to have cows. Knock on wood, so far we haven’t. But, with that means we don’t have alot of cows. We have 14. Now, you say, geesh that isn’t alot. You are correct. Although, those 14 still need to be fed, ice chopped in the winter, doctored, calved, branded and in the end, sold.

The circle starts in July turning the bull out. Free love and a long hot summer. Fall comes and the bull says goodbye and the girls turn their full attention to their calf that they had this past spring. Once we feel the calves are a good weight we choose which of the heifers we will keep and all the boys go down the road. The calves that we keep will either build up the numbers or will replace the cows that are going down the road. Either the cow is old, lost a calf, or bat shit crazy and they head to the sale barn.

This year The Stauff and I scrutinized the calves pretty hard. All of our cows are easy going and nice looking cows, so there really isn’t a bad choice. Numbers were written down on which calves would head down the road and which ones were staying with us. Now to the cows. Two cows were pulled.

We have one cow, “Frosty” who is seriously cake broke. You have a couple cubes of cake in your hand and she will walk through the depths of hell with you. She got the name frosty as she has a white circle on her face along with a little white above her eye. She is a great leader of the bunch and if she starts walking the others will follow right behind her. But. The past two years she threw a huge calf that she couldn’t have on her own and by the time we got her in and the calf pulled, the calf was dead. We thought the first year was a fluke. Just something odd that kicked out. This past year, it was the same thing. Another dead calf and my heart broke for her as she is a very good mama cow. The Stauff said we couldn’t do another year.

The next one that was chosen was “BJ”. BJ stands for Bum Junior as her mother was our very first “Bum” we had and probably the best cow we have ever had. BJ lost her first calf and it was also the first calf I lost tending cows. We both took it hard, me, maybe a little more. But the next year she calved in a snow storm on her own and turned out to be just like her mama. One hell of a cow. She turned out some nice calves. Last winter she must have slipped on some ice and she has had issues once in awhile getting around. The Stauff and I decided that we couldn’t watch her this winter, so she would go down the road.

Then, the babies. The babies are the hardest ones. We look at how the mother is, how her feet are, how she is aging, etc. Thinking that if we keep one of their heifers, that is the genetics that we will be dealing with for awhile. The steer calves are a no brainer, they roll on down the road. But his year, there was SteveO.

SteveO was born in a horrible snow storm and had a zero chance at life. His Mother, #03, (the one with crazy flat bangs) was a first time Mom. I watched as she went by the house with snow coming in side ways, while switching her tail. As the wind screamed, I prayed all would go well. She did calve, but the calf wouldn’t get up. She had him in an old huge culvert. It is an ideal place actually. Out of the wind and snow. I would check on them throughout the afternoon, and the calf was still not up. I would try to help it up, but it was a huge calf and there was nothing I was going to do to help. As the night krept in, so did the cold. The calf was shaking cold and wet. The new Mom, clueless as to what she needed to do, stood and watched me. I decided I would have to take it inside or else it would be dead by morning, but how. We had a ton of snow, but I was able to get the four wheeler into the culvert. I grabbed an old bed spread and threw him on top of it. I grabbed rope and tied him up around the bed spread. A make shift sled. I tied it up to the four wheeler and we started to the house. I pulled him right to the basement door using the mounds of snow as a cushion for him to lay on. I drug his half alive body into the warmth of the basement and I laid him right next to the wood stove. The hound started licking on him and I started rubbing him down with towels. I grabbed a bottle and some colostrum. He finally started to drink and was warming up. All through the night the hound and I laid with him. As the sun was stretching into the basement, the calf was stretching and wanting to get up. I tried to steady him as he stood up. Pretty soon he was starting to stand on his own.

Later that day The Stauff would break through the drifts and was able to get home. He helped me take the calf to the barn and brought in his mother. It took the mama a few hours to love up to her calf, but she did. She did just as we figured out the calf had more issues. His front joint were swelled up. A phone call to the vet. More than likely had a infection that came through his umbilical cord. The infection usually effected joints and the brain. A 50/50 shot he would make it. I felt defeated. We started giving him medicine around the clock like the vet instructed. It took about 4 days and he finally started to walk like he should. J and I was watching him one day and J said “I think we call him SteveO, he looks like a SteveO)”. She was right, SteveO it was. After a week of being penned up, we turned them back to the rest of the cows. It wasn’t a month and SteveO came up lame again. He hurt his front hoof somehow, but about 2 weeks later he was running amuck with the other calves. He turned out just fine.

Which leads us to today. Yesterday we got the cows and calves in. We took our little note on who was staying and who was leaving with us. Cows and calves that were staying went to the north pen. The ones that were heading to the sale barn, went to the west pen. I watched SteveO buck around and run. Thinking of the hell he went through. How many times he looked at death straight in the face and somehow managed to pull through. With all the cows sorted, we fed them and let them set for the night. This AM up bright and early to head to down to load. The Stauff backed up the trailer to the corrals. We took the cows to a smaller pen to pull the calves off. The cows sorted easy. They were ready to get out of the corrals. With the calves separated out, gates were swung the other way to push them down the alley to the trailer. The ran down the alley and jumped right into the trailer just like they knew what they were doing.

The Stauff locked up the doors and nodded as he jumped into the pick up to head to the sale barn. I went to grab the pickup to throw hay to the cows. As I was walking to the gate I looked up at the cows. All the cows that were in the pen with me was watching the trailer with their babie in it. As the pickup started to move so did they. They started to walk along side the corral, bawling for them. As the pick up dropped below the meadow, the bawling got louder, they turned and ran to the furthest pen still watching, still bawling. I grabbed my pitch fork and started to pitch hay to them, with hot tears rolling down my cheeks. SteveO’s Mom just stood there in the pen watching until the only thing left was the dust settling back to the ground. She came back to the rest of the cows who were busy munching on the hay. I made myself busy pitching more hay. #03 walked up the fence and just stood there looking at me. I glanced up at her and here eyes were set on me. Hot tears mixed with hay flakes as they rolled down my cheek. “Don’t look at me” I told her. I stood there moving hay around until she relented and started to eat. I got in the cold pick up and went home. I fixed a hot tea as I wiped my tear/hay streaked face. I stared at the window and muttered “this shit isn’t for the weak”.

And, that is how life on the ranch makes a full circle. There are days when you want to sell them all and days that you want to keep them all. I have called them a few names over the year, sometimes it was a “you son of a bitch”. But, it was done with all love. The care we give them, the prayers we say over them as a storm rolls in all comes to this day. A full circle, just as we get ready for calving season this spring to start it all over again.

A stomach ache for sure…

Posted on by onlyinastauffworld

Round 2… I was too tired last night to care about raccoons.. I told the hound before we went to bed to be sure and potty as much as she could as we weren’t getting up till dawn. So.. she did.. but the raccoons wanted to play.. the hound shook her collar about 5 AM and I agreed that probably the coast was clear. I slowly opened the door and no raccoons.. but.. I had grabbed some old jars of carmel that I had canned awhile back with all intentions of taking the contents to the dump. They beat me to it. To the left they had the lid and ring and an empty jar laying amongst the grass. To the right they had the rest… none were opened but every ring was loose.. they were close. I have bets that they have a belly ache this am. The Stauff looked the jars over and laughed, “you should leave the others out here, they cleaned them up pretty good”. I almost wished I could have watched that go down. Looks like teeth marks on the rings.. ingenious little bastards.

Which leads me to think about how it all went down. Of course the family comes wondering through the yard looking and smelling for anything that might peak their stomach. They see the carmel jars nestled into the little brown box sitting nicely on the chair outside the front door. They smell a whiff of sugar and get excited. The siblings jump around each other each eagerly trying their hand at grabbing one. 14 baby paws and a cranky ole mother sitting there on the step trying to hatch a plan to get the goods. They start prying with their teeth until one won the spin with the teeth on the ring and the ring broke loose. Tiny fingers managed to twist the ring off. Now the lid. A quick pry with the teeth and wahlah, the heavenly crystalized contents awaited them. Only problem, there was only 1 jar and 7 little racconns vying for the sugar. Now, I have had little kids and I know what they are like when they both want something. They fight. I would have loved to watch 7 raccoons pushing, shoving and fighting to get their lick of gold or a paw smeared with it. They must have gotten along well though since the other jars also all teeth marks in the rings.

But then… if that wasn’t a good enough show… Any good mother knows, when it is time, it is time. At what point did their mother raccoon look at her little raccoon watch, moon, sun coming up etc and say “attention my babies, it is time to go back home for the night”. How did that work? How did she throw that rationale out there to walk away from all the jars that were so close, but alas unopened? Was she stern? Did she rap them on the hands and grab each one? Did she give them a good swift kick in the ass and tell them to get home now.. before the crazy women inside with her stoned hound comes out and finds them? Like the old saying “It was like putting candy in front of a little kid and telling them that they can’t have it”. hmm.. makes a person wonder. I need a ring camera at our door..