Rattlesnake meets Jeep tire..

Night at the ranch..kids want to go look for porcupines tonight.. we wait for the dark and head out..I fore told the story before we left.. 1) it is still really windy..2) we will not see anything because of #1.. we head out..we see rabbits and a kitten..no pines..right below the house coming home what do our blood shot eyes see? A rattlesnake slithering across the road..I tell the kids to give me a light so I can survey the critter I am about to rip apart. Kinda big, probably 5 rattles.. Magee slides to my side of the jeep. He says “I will hold the light for you, so you can get the tire square on him”.. we jockey a bit and squish him..back up..survey..still not good enough..jay says, “come on, peel out on it”.. I get lined up again to peel out on the thing. Magee is holding a light out the passenger window so we can keep track of it. I get ready..peel out..we hear the famous ‘pop’..Magee immediately starts hollering, “AHHH..I got snake guts on my arm.. Ah Ah… bleh bleh.. I think I am going to throw up..bleh bleh..omg..I can’t believe it’s guts blew up like that.. I need a shower..omg..” jay and I are dying laughing.. 😂..we inspect our kill.. definitely dead and we saved the rattles.. Magee is still in panic mode that he has 🐍 snake guts on him.. then he gets quite..”oh, I guess it wasn’t snake guts..I think it was just the rain”.. jay and I look at each other bust up laughing.. I glanced back and said “rain? Are you sure?”.. he said “yeah when I put my arm out I think rain drops landed on my arm at the same time as the ‘pop’ happened”. I am good..😂😂😂😂.. pine =0 .. rattlesnake (including the one the kids killed earlier this afternoon) = 2…😆

Home…Alas…

So after a long week in town..all tracks meet cancelled we finally get to head home Friday night.. lots of rain made the road more interesting, sloppy and 4 wheel drive Jeep commercial for the last couple miles..but home just the same..The Stauff ran downstairs to start a roaring 🔥 fire downstairs while the kids and I unloaded the jeep. There is a high pitched noise coming from the office.. the electricity must have gone out and kicked the surge protector out.. I shut it off and I get busy with supper..keep in mind the surge protector has internet life plugged into it.. no surge protector turned on..no internet..jay wanders through the kitchen and casually says, “so…there is no internet?”. I tell her, “why, yes you are correct, the surge protector must have died”. She gets a far away look in her eyes and mumbles, “oh ok”. .. I smile and say, “well weekend with no internet, we are set”. I laughed a little too long about it. She didn’t see my humor. I get supper on the table.. Friday night 🌮 tacos.. a staple..we eat and the kids do dishes.. The Stauff looks at me and says, “kinda chilly in here isn’t it?”. I agreed.. he went to turn the furnace up as we have it set to be lower during the week. He turns it up..nothing.. he wanders to the furnace..pretty soon we hear The Stauff holler from the furnace room, “hey, I need my phone and a screw driver, could someone grab that?”. My brain spins, “what the hell is he doing with his phone?”. I decided to stay mum and watch..he grabs his phone and uses the flashlight..aha I thought, smart in his old age.. jay wandered past me looking to be in a coma state..she says, “we really wont have internet this weekend?” I glanced at her and gave her the ‘look’, “I guess it depends on how my mood develops”. Wyatt interjects, “well you know if it is just the surge protector, we do have a new ☝️ one. You could just change it out”. I looked at ‘Einstein’ and said “yes you are correct, but you would have to move the whole desk and shelving to unplug it..not sure I want to tackle that tonight”. They both hunched their shoulders and staggered to the couch..pretty soon the furnace dr comes out with an internal organ of the furnace…”no heat tonight..when the electricity went out it must have fried this piece. Will have to go to town & try to find this to fix it”. He smiled at me and said, “warm downstairs”.. I have been dreaming of my bed all week.. I say, “come on Stauff, we will just throw a couple more blankets on..it will be like ⛺️ camping”… we both laughed and glanced at both kids not looking happy.. jay is so fidgety 😬 she looks like an addict needing their cocaine fix and Wyatt is just sitting there staring at his 🎣 fishing pole. I laugh, “oh me, really?? We are both moping cause there is no internet?”. Wyatt just sits there, but Jay starts. “Do you know what is going on tonight?”. I say, “ummmm, no I guess I don’t? What is going on?” She stares at me, “it is the NFL draft!! How am I supposed to know where all the Oklahoma Sooners are going to? Mixon??? Perine???” I laughed and was like “well, we have TV? I am sure it is on ESPN, I would go watch it on TV?” I get a tiny eye roll..”Mom.. I doubt it is on local TV”. I sat there and closed my eyes..now my sweet 13 year old tomboy knows her shit with the Sooners.. she can spit stats, who the players are, what position they play, what year of school they are in, what they are majoring in AND who is going to the draft… but she thinks ESPN is a local channel..I looked over at The Stauff and he is just smiling at me.. I get up and go reboot the surge protector and didn’t say a word. I grabbed my iPad and all the notifications started coming in.. they both perked up.. Wyatt said, “how is yours working?”.. I thought about coming up with some wild story, but honestly I was cold and just admitted that I fixed the surge protector and internet had been restored.. they both whipped out their phones like six shooters..I went and turned ESPN on in our room curled up with blankets and watched the highlights of the 2nd round draft picks.. jay joined..I think half ass amazed on this new ‘local’ channel..we finally went to bed and about 4:30 this AM The Stauff gets called in to work.. he heads out the door 🚪 to bog out the muddy path and smiles, “I will get you your furnace part on my way 🏡 home. So..no heat upstairs and the internet is spinning..oh to be home..

A Throwback to a Yeti Day..

It is that famous time of year when we do State Testing across the beautiful state of Wyoming. Being Admin and stationed at the office I am one of a few who gets a straw to drive across the state. I love to drive..throw in my XM radio, which is cranked up way past what my kids allow. Usually my trips are..umm..rather interesting….nothing huge this time, so I am adding in a trip I took a couple years ago across the Bighorn Mountain range.. Before I tell that story, I will say, I saw something tonight that kinda blew a little life back into my soul.. maybe more of a hope for human kind.. My phone charger (#5474980393093 that I have owned..joking..but you feel my pain with the cheap SOB’s) broke yesterday, so I have no way to charge my phone..I went to Walmart tonight to buy yet another one of them. I am in line to check out and the cutest little boy is there with his Dad checking out. There is another couple in front of me.. This little guy is having the best conversation with “Kathy” the checkout lady.. He tells her goodbye and “Kathy” tells him goodbye and that she will see him next time.. I thought to myself, “Aww, so cute”.  The couple in front of me says after the little kiddo left, “Is that your grandson?”. Kathy says, “no, he isn’t.. I met him a awhile ago at Walmart. He must really like me as he always tracks me down when him and his Dad come to the store and he visits with me”.  The couple ask “Do you have grandkids?”. Kathy says, “Oh yes, I have 6 grandkids”. The couple says, “Well that little guy must know that you must be a great Grandma to be around”. Kathy just laughed and said, “I am not sure about that, but he sure is my buddy”.  So the couple leave and I am checking out.. the little guy and his Dad come back. I hear the Dad tell him to wait cause Kathy is working. Kathy and I both glance up. This little guy is holding a card with the name Kathy scribbled on the front. She told him, “hold on, I am with a customer and then I will come over ok”. Now this kid is about 4 and he just sits there with excitement oozing from his grin. She gets done checking me out and walks over to the kiddo.. He gives her this card and tells her it is thanks for being such a great friend.. she kneeled down and asked him for a hug.. the little guy ran to her  engulfed into her arms..I had to pull myself together a little.. It has been awhile since I saw such kindness.. I walked to the Jeep and sat there thinking about that little guy and watched them walk out of the store.. He had a smile a mile long and threw a smile to the sky all the way to their car.. That kid is meant for great things.. NOW..on to the Yeti..

The yeti story..so a few miles out of tensleep there is construction..flaggers..I pulled up yesterday just as my line was leaving.damn my luck I thought..the flagger wasn’t sure what side of the jeep to walk up to.he hee hawed in front of the jeep like he was starting the cotton eyed Joe..I rolled Down the passenger window..he strolled up the window with a straggly pony tail braid flipping in the wind..he says..nice jeep..I like it..how much does this run a month? Let me guess. Over $600.00. I laughed at him, oh no, about $400.00.. He says, “oh Hell, that ain’t bad, what did you trade in?” I said, “a Silverado”, he says “oh that is why your payments are so low, Chevy tough and they keep there value”, I laughed “well it wasn’t Chevy tough anymore hence why it went down the road.” I glanced up the road needing to see the pilot car..No luck..I told myself to lead the conversation before we go through his drug history..since he was into the jeep I told him that it was the arctic edition..he pondered that and more questions came pouring out, which i happily filled in tio kill time. I ended my talk with, they call this edition the yeti edition..he stopped everything and asked me to repeat what I just said..I said it is called the yeti edition, hence the footprints on the fender and hood, the seats etc..he flashed me his two teeth and pointed to the mountains, they are up there ya know. I looked at him and said huh? He continued..”yetis live up there on those mountains”, I grinned from ear to ear, “well the Hell you say? How dui you know that?” He is a serious,”because we talk to each other” I choked down a chuckle and cleared my throat, “well no shit?? That is amazing..And how do you do this?” He says, “well ya know flagging out here it gets boring, so I just start screaming and hollering, you would be amazed what answers me from up there..” And what do you reply to that?? “Well shit, that is crazy”. Then he says, “you would be safe tho.” I said, ” well why do you say that?”. He patted my seat and said, “because you drive their jeep, you are probably like their girlfriend.haha, they would say hey look it is our girlfriend bringing us our jeep”. And just like that the pilot car shows up.he taps the side of the jeep, “well there ya go you are on your way..No stopping and playing with yetis now..I will hollar at then later..” I giggled..”No worries, I am on a mission”..I laughed all the way over the mountain.

 

Just to be home..

Oh to be home… what started off as a fun trip home.. sucked..stay put…I had myself all worked up about the hwy north..I usually worry more about the other yahoos on the road..so we can take a dirt road all the way home..I told the kids let’s take that road home..away we go..snowing right along..we get to the end of that road jump across the highway to the other dirt road.. it is dark now..away we go..I am going about 30 -35 mph..I drive down into a draw, come up the top and there is an auto gate on top, I try to turn and I just slid right into the auto gate..busted my rear fender off..wyatt jumps out and gathers the pieces and we throw them in the back.. I say some choice words and away we go..I put it back into 4×4..away we go all a little freaked out from the accident and then I look around.. I say “where in the hell are we?” The kids are quiet.. again choice words fly from my mouth.. start back tracking..find the road we should have turned on..away we go..we start to go around a hill..snow flies up over the hood and covers the window..can’t see a thing..I reluctantly slow and I can feel the jeep sink..more profound words come out..I opened my door to survey my situation..I pushed snow when I open the door.. wyatt and I start digging..then I told him to get in..this is a jeep right? 4 low, 1,2,3.. boom we are out..continue on..now before anyone asks “why the hell did you go?” I will say this to my defense.. “I have NO ever mother loving idea”…when we hit the ranch auto gate I told the kids “holy shit, when I get home I am going to have a drink”. Wyatt says “when I get home, I am going to help unload the jeep, start a fire downstairs and have some whiskey”. Jay says “I wonder what crown and hot cocoa tastes like?” I glanced at her, “I would assume like shit..but at this stage of the game what the hell give it a whirl”… O M G.. WTH??? Home safe and sound and my guardian angel is ordering shots..😳😳😇🤔